Every once in a while, the good Lord puts someone in your path who changes irrevocably the trajectory of your journey. And while I have never subscribed to the notion that every single thing we do is somehow orchestrated and predestined by God to happen – as so many Christians seem to – I nonetheless acknowledge the all too apparent fact that there are a lot of “coincidences” out there that just aren’t reconcilable by anything other than Devine intervention.
The summer of 2005 tested my faith. I had grown increasingly bitter over the growth of fundamentalist Christianity in America. It was even seeping into my own church. Frustrated at the lack of pushback I saw coming from more moderate and progressive groups within the Christian community, I considered giving up and leaving the Church altogether. Note, I wasn’t giving up on Jesus, but I had had it with His people. If there was a better way, I was determined to find it, even if it meant leaving the familiar surroundings of a congregation I had been a part of for nearly fourteen years.
But before leaving, I decided to give one of the associate pastors at the church a call. I had known Steve Munson for about five years. We were both in an accountability group with two other men from our church, and I wanted to run what I was thinking and feeling by him. I once had a very close and trusting relationship with another member of the church, but she had made a decision to leave the faith altogether. I guess what I was after was a reality check.
After listening to me for what must’ve seemed like forever, Steve said something that quite frankly surprised me. On every single point I made about the Church and the direction it seemed to be heading, he concurred. He also said he shared my concern and frustration, and while he did not chide me about my decision to quit the whole thing, he did make a suggestion that shall we say intrigued me.
He informed me that he had been writing a blog for several years, which he said was an outlet for the frustrations and concerns he was feeling as a Christian. In it he could share those thoughts that he could not otherwise share with certain members of the congregation. He showed me the blog – Where Do I Go To Surrender (I still remember it) – and as I read the postings two things hit me almost simultaneously: one, Steve was a helluva good writer; and two, I had never known that side of Steve before. I always knew he was somewhat left of center on certain issues, but I never knew he had such passionate views about certain topics.
He explained how easy it was to set up a blog and that I might find it an enjoyable outlet just like he did. And then he issued a challenge. Steve is not one to confront you right away; rather he takes a more deliberative and delicate tact, which I’ve always found is far more effective, especially with strong-willed types such as me.
The “challenge” he issued was not to make any decisions just yet. Rather, he said, I should set up a blog and start expressing my thoughts and feelings on it. It would be a shame if I let the enemy win and deprived God’s church of yet another soul. He said there were more of us out there than I was willing to concede and that I owed it to them as well as myself to stay in and fight the good fight. If, after I gave it a whirl, I still felt like leaving that option would still be there.
I wouldn’t say I left his office totally convinced, but I did stay in the Church. And over the last six years, I have in deed fought the good fight, putting in more than my nickel’s worth of opinion, some of it welcomed, the rest not so much. So, you see, it’s Steve’s fault that I became the blogger that I am and the canker soar I can be to some.
Seriously, from that moment on, though I didn’t know it at the time, I would develop a trusting and special relationship with Steve. We would often discuss topics that were of mutual interest to us, trading blog postings and commenting on each other’s sites. More often than not, he was the only one who made any comments at all on mine. At least I knew somebody out there was reading me and for that I was and am grateful.
In my times of need, I could always count on his Godly advice and compassionate heart. When I had gone through a severe mid-life crisis in the autumn of ’07, which again tested my faith – not to mention my sanity – Steve was once again there for me. He didn’t judge or lecture me, but rather consoled and comforted me. He was far more a counselor than a pastor, a teacher more than a preacher.
Over my fifty years of living, I have gotten to know a good many people, some of whom left a positive impression with me; others, well let’s just say I shed no tears that they are no longer around. Go with God, I say. Steve Munson has been one of those few men who has not only left a positive impression with me, he has taught me to rethink what my definition of a man is and what it means to be one of God’s children. No matter what ordeal – emotional or physical – he might’ve been going through, he always found the time to ask you how you were doing. Me? I get a hangnail and I’ll bore you to tears about how heavy my cross is. Not Steve. He was always other focused. Like Jesus, he considered it his mission to be a humble servant. And it that endeavor he was found not wanting.
That was Steve. That IS Steve. Never the complainer, always the trusted servant. His flock was who ever happened to be in front of him, and he felt it his duty to ensure that all the sheep were present and accounted for. In a world that only sees and acknowledges the stupendous and Herculean-type feats, men like Steve Munson are rare in deed. But what I have come to realize and appreciate is that the glory that some crave is all too fleeting, but the true nobleness of the selfless man is the only thing that endures.
A while back, I learned that this man, who had been so instrumental in my walk, would soon be leaving the church. When I first heard the news, my heart was heavy. It was a bittersweet moment for me. On the one hand, I was happy for him and his family. While I always enjoyed Steve’s sermons, deep down I knew that was not his calling. He always seemed like the square peg in a round hole. There was something else out there that the Lord had in store for him, and I always suspected he would one day leave in search of it. So I was NOT surprised to hear that he was leaving.
What makes this bittersweet is the thought that I am losing someone in my life who has made a difference; someone who has been a mentor of sorts and someone I can bounce ideas off of. And while I know that in this age of social media no one is ever truly gone from our lives, it just won’t be the same, somehow. A chapter has come to an end and now it is time to turn the page. Parting is such sweet sorrow, after all.
So I want to send this off to you, my good friend, to thank you for all the phone calls, emails and personal visits (both in your office and at your home) that helped steer this listing ship of mine safely into port. Knowing you the way I do, you will undoubtedly defer all the credit to God, and that is fitting, I suppose. After all, we are nothing without Him who gives us strength.
But I think, nay know, that in this Kingdom, many are called to serve; few have answered the bell so faithfully and tirelessly as you have. As you depart with your family to North Carolina, I hope you find what your true calling is. I know, once you do, you will bring the same selfless dedication to it that you brought to your vocation here. Our loss will be their gain.
You have touched profoundly the lives of so many that words alone cannot suffice both the loss and joy I feel at this moment, but I will try nonetheless. If I may evoke a passage from scripture, this one, I believe, would crystallize the sentiment perfectly. “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
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